‘I wonder. I always wonder. Are they looking at me? I’m sure they are. And what are they thinking? Nothing good for sure. They are just judging me, my body, the way I look, the way I talk, the way I am. And I’m sure they don’t like what they see.’ Many of us have these or very similar thoughts assaulting our minds most of the time. Whenever there’s somebody else around, the thoughts come and invade us. We worry and fret.
After working as a humanologist for so long, there’s something I learned that might help. Whatever others think of us is only their business, not ours! Let me clarify this…
All of us see the world (and other human beings) differently. The world might be the same reality but each of us perceives it in a unique way that is only ours. That is so because we all wear invisible glasses. We all look at the world while wearing our own worldview lenses. The lenses are made of all the experiences, lessons, beliefs and perspectives that we’ve been accumulating in our lives. The personal worldview is something that we develop as we grow and change and there’s nothing we can do to stop it from being. It just is part of us. We all have different glasses on.
That means, then, that when others look at us, they can only see us through their worldview lenses. When we look at ourselves, we also see ourselves through our own glasses. And what we see and what they see is necessarily different. They can only see you their own, personal way, never yours. Because they’re not you. You look at yourself, and you see one person. They look at you, and they see somebody else. Being that so, how can they judge the real you? They can’t even see it! Whenever you feel like others are judging you, remember that they’re only judging the you that they see. And don’t forget that the YOU that they see is not like any other YOU anybody else sees. Nobody sees YOU the exact same way. You are unique to everyone else. Then, why not stop bothering, all together? They will never see you the way you want them to, and you will never see them the way they expect you to. That’s the way the world is.
You can fight it. Or you can accept it.
Nobody is truly judging the YOU that you think you show or the you that you TRULY are. Then, why not just BE and focus on becoming the best YOU that YOU see and you are?
Enjoy life… ALL of it,
Jessica J. Lockhart – humanology – www.jessicajlockhart.com
Jessica J. Lockhart is a humanologist, author of 4 books and renowned international speaker. Follow her here: