All of us have felt hurt by others at some point in our lives. To stop being hurt again, we often try to become invincible. I believe we should try and become invulnerable instead, not invincible. Let me tell you a story…
Somebody I know suffered from an early love betrayal in her life. She then decided to never be hurt again. Every time she met a man, she would fall “in love” with him and then sabotage the relationship to avoid being hurt once more. Of course, she wasn’t aware of her own sabotaging until we discussed it and she could see it. The problem was that she’d decided to become invincible, that is, to not let anybody or anything hurt her instead of becoming invulnerable, that is, becoming inmune to pain from others.
When you’re invincible, you close yourself to the world and create a shield of protection around you. When you’re invulnerable, you let the pain go through without staying with you, without reaching you.
If you choose to become invincible, you might not be hurt, you might not feel what others do to you. But you will have to be resisting their actions to keep on protecting yourself. You’ll have to keep the shield up all the time and that takes a toll on you. If you choose to become invulnerable, people’s attacks go through you. You let them go. You are in charge. You decide that nothing can hurt you but not because you stop it before it gets to you but because you’re willing to accept that people say and do whatever they want to without it having to affect you.
Invincibility isolates you. Invulnerability frees you. By becoming invincible you stop your feelings. By becoming invulnerable you admit your feelings and decide they won’t hurt you.
If you want to be happier, choose to become invulnerable instead of invincible
Enjoy life… ALL of it,
Jessica J. Lockhart – humanology – www.jessicajlockhart.com
Jessica J. Lockhart is a humanologist, bestselling author and renowned international speaker. Follow her here: